I read an article a few weeks back that really hit home about unanswered emails clogging up the author's inbox and the euphoria she felt when she cleared it up. You can read it here: Unanswered Emails Were the Bane of my Life by Moya Sarner at the guardian.com. Now, I say a few weeks, but the truth is that I actually emailed myself the link so that I could write a post about it, and it promptly got lost in my own insane inbox. I found it last night while going through my own purge, and it was dated February 12th. Last night I couldn't get to sleep. I work nights, so for obvious reasons I often have trouble sleeping on my nights off. Sometimes I (quietly) putter around the house, sometimes I read, play video games, or binge watch Netflix or whatever has piled up on my PVR. However, spring seems to actually be here, and I've been getting that cleaning itch. Since it's 2:30am, I'm not exactly going to go outside and start raking the lawn. Well, I might have, but it was raining, and still not warm enough for that. So I decided it was time. Now, just for clarification, I had nowhere near 16,000 unread emails in my inbox. I had probably about 700 unread, and maybe another 500 read, but just sitting there waiting to be dealt with. I have a terrible habit of glancing at emails and leaving them, figuring I'll get to them eventually. Usually I don't. Since I was in a mood and nothing was interesting me, I decided to plunge head first into clearing up - totally - my inbox. For the next five hours I almost went blind dealing with the nightmare that had become my inbox. I did not re-read Sarner's article prior to writing this, but I believe that she went about clearing hers in stages. I wanted to do mine all in one night, but decided to actually do it in two phases. Not really because I wanted to, but I had to. I just didn't have the time or the fortitude to do the kind of sweeping purge I had in mind all in one night. I do feel a certain kind of lightness looking at the emptiness. However, I also now have this nagging at the back of my mind that I need to keep on top of this, need to keep it clear, need to keep checking. I think I've checked my inbox more today than all of last week, dealing with each new email as it comes. I'm going to have to find a happy balance, but will continue with my new madness for at least the foreseeable future. So what, exactly did I do for five hours? I did it in stages. First I deleted all the old emails that I wanted to continue receiving, but had no value to me because they were outdated. Today's world runs at top speed, so I don't really need the headlines of my daily 680news.com any older than yesterday. I also closed my eyes and deleted any other weekly or dailies that I am subscribed to straight out, without even looking at them. That was the easy part. Next, I went line by line and did one of three things, I either unsubscribed, placed it in a folder, or dealt with it. I also cleaned up all my folders and nested them under only three main ones so that I could see them at all times instead of having to scroll through the 50 or so folders I created. The hardest thing to do was deal with the ones that were left. A great many were already 'expired' - meaning that whatever I had pushed aside with the intent of going through had been pushed aside for too long. So surveys I wanted to take, reviews I wanted to write, offers I wanted to take advantage of are all gone. There's a lesson here. I need to stop procrastinating. In my real life as well as my online life. So that's it. I have 7 emails left. One is a tax receipt I'll be using up tomorrow when I finally get around to doing our taxes, two were sent from hubby about stuff he wants me to research for him, one is a shipping notice for an item I haven't received yet, and the last three are quick ones I have promised myself I will deal with before I go to bed tonight. What's phase two? A little simpler. I'll go through all of the emails I have in folders and delete anything older than a year, other than pictures. And so my purge will be complete and I will feel permanently lighter.
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I have spent most of my adult life steering clear of politics, my eyes often glazing over as I listened to others discuss it. It didn't even matter what kind; Canadian, American, World, it all just bored me. That is not to say that the world of politics is boring - far from it. That world seems rife with excesses in money, sexual exploits, and especially lies. That last one is really what kept me away from it for so long, very few politicians tell the truth, or even answer a direct question. I find it maddening. With the rise and subsequent crowning of the messiah of the 'forgotten man', I am loathe to admit that I haven't missed a day watching CNN. If I'm awake, it's on my TV, even if I'm not really paying attention. I soak this drama up the same way some people devour the exploits of the Kardashians or the Real Housewives of [insert city here]. Mostly I feel like I'm watching a train wreck in slow motion - I really cannot believe that this is actually happening. Sometimes I watch, mouth agape, in sheer disbelief of what I have just witnessed/heard/read... sometimes all three at the same time. I often can't understand how anyone with a functioning brain stem thinks that this man, and what he clearly stands for, is fit to run a lemonade stand, much less an entire country. Now that that's out of the way, I, like so many others, feel the need to weigh in on the Trump/NLF battle raging in the US right now. Why should you listen to my opinion? Why am I qualified to even give an opinion? Well, you don't have to read this, and I'm not really qualified for anything, but my opinion is mine, and that is why I have a blog called sonjarants. I do more cooking, baking, and reviewing than actual ranting on this site, but when I feel strongly about something, I need to let it out. I'm going to start by saying that I was initially against Colin Kaepernick not standing during the US National Anthem. I take great pride in my country (I'm actually Canadian, in case you didn't know) and often actually well up when I hear my anthem. I feel a great respect for our anthem and our flag, because they represent the men and women who fought and continue to fight (in numerous ways), and those who gave their lives so that I can say and do pretty much anything I want. In other words, something as simple as a song and a piece of cloth represents so much more than I can articulate. I felt (what feels like 100 years ago) that anyone, anyone who doesn't respect their country's flag and anthem, no matter the reason, was in the wrong. case closed. It was Donald Trump himself who changed my mind. I, unlike Trump, knew why Kaepernick was kneeling, but I thought that he could maybe find a different way to call attention to it. Racial inequality and police brutality are important issues which require attention, conversation, action. I hate to admit it, but I wasn't paying a whole lot of attention to it. It's going on in the States (not saying that we don't have our own racial issues here), it's involving a protest by an NFL player (I only watch football once a year), and, quite frankly, before January of this year, I didn't really keep on top of current events. I knew what was going on, knew I didn't approve, I moved on with my life. Since this whole thing has blown up on CNN (I might have mentioned I'm slightly addicted), I've had the opportunity to learn more about it, to reflect upon the meaning behind it, and to change my view. I realize now that by kneeling, Kaepernick isn't disrespecting those who fought for his freedoms - he is showing his outrage that those who are still suppressing him are the ones actually showing disrespect for all of those who fought and died so that he could take every advantage of them. I hope I said that clearly enough: in the US right now, his freedoms as a human being are somehow different from mine in the eyes of the law, mainly because he is a black man and I am a white woman. No. Your constitution is not mine, but I think that we all know the phrase "All men are created equal". Equal means equal. The same. Identical. Uniform. Alike. Parallel. I could go on with the synonyms, but I'm sure that anyone reading this will understand at least one of those terms. And since he, and those he is kneeling for, and many countless others are not being treated equally, two centuries after those words were penned, well, that isn't right, and should be protested. Follow this link to hear Dale Hansen explain what's going on - he does a great job for those of you still on the fence on this issue. President Donald J. Trump has more immediate issues that require his focus rather than picking a fight with the NFL over an issue he doesn't even understand. Like The disaster in Puerto Rico. Like DACA. Tax reform. Obamacare. Travel bans. Insane travel costs incurred by spendthrift cabinet members. Jared's emails. The Russia thing. Shall I go on? Because I could. The list seems almost endless. Perhaps right at the top I should have mentioned mending race relations or even calling Nazi white supremacists sons-of-bitches, instead of peaceful protestors. I'm pretty sure there are numerous Americans (and people all over the world) who are just holding their breath, counting the days until this nightmare presidency is over so that they can start to finally pick up the pieces and try to heal their country. Kaepernick was trying to do just that when he started to #TakeAKnee. #45's sad legacy will be The Great Divider. He promised to Make America Great Again, but all he seems to be doing is tearing it apart for ratings.
Art by DestinyBlue I had always intended to write a post about depression. I continually put it off because it isn't really something I like to talk about. I'm thankful that it is more out in the open, that people are talking about it, bringing this disease into the light, because for all the years I have been battling it, it was something to keep hidden because to everyone not affected by it, it's not a real thing. It's something in my head, not a real disease. When you grow up this way, you learn to keep quiet, to fight your battles silently, to smile at the whole world on the outside while inside you're screaming and wishing for an end. Today I read a post on Facebook. I was going to just leave it be, but afterwards I went into the garden, and as I was working away, what I had seen started eating away at me. It occurred to me that although the guy in the video thinks he's helping, and maybe even people who are sharing the video think they're helping, it's actually belittling the disease. It is a classic "just get over it" mentality, which has long plagued depression and kept it in the shadows. So as I stewed I realized that this is almost a case of 'one step forward, two steps back', here we are, dragging depression, and mental illnesses of all kinds, into the light, trying to help those affected, and someone pops up giving some terrible advice to drag us all back to the stone ages. Telling someone with depression to just wait until it passes is essentially treating acne by bloodletting, which they actually did in the seventeenth century. See the video here. The comment is what actually set me off. Because he's actually saying that you need to get over it. That, ladies and gents, is the two steps back I referred to earlier. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. However, there is a difference between opinion and basically giving medical advice. In your opinion, I am sad, so I should just wait for it to pass. In reality, I have a medically diagnosed illness that requires medication, and actually will not 'pass' if I just wait long enough (trust me, I have tried). The 'depression' that he is talking about in his video is not the real thing. Everyone gets sad sometimes, and he is right, that will pass. Even heavy sadness following the loss of a loved one or the end of a relationship is extreme and weighs you down, but it is a temporary feeling, and you will eventually get past it. I do think the analogies he uses in the video are actually correct - just not in the way he intends. Yes, the sky (you) is always there and the clouds (depression) come and go, but if you look around, you'll probably see more clouds, even if the patch of sky right above you at the moment is clear. Sometimes they're even angrier than the ones that just passed. And that is depression. Real, clinical depression. Look up at the sky. More often than not there are clouds. The patches of clear sky are much fewer. So it is with depression. You have clear days. You have days when you can function as a regular human being. You can get up in the morning and have a full day of just being a person. Not exhausted, not sick, and it's glorious. Then the clouds come back. And they always do. Second analogy, same thing. The remote control is in the picture, then it's not, then it is. Again, it comes back. Only this time he's proving my point even more: He never lets go of the remote. He's holding it the whole time. Depression is like that. It's always there, even when its not, except that it holds you, not the other way around. Art by 113-nk So let's take a look at depression, what causes it? I want to talk about it in the clinic sense, not my fiancee just left me at the altar and I'm going to eat ice cream until my tears are done. Medical science is not exactly sure what causes depression, their best guesses are that many factors are at play, environmental, psychological, and biological. For the sake of this post, I only want to focus on the biological factors. In other words, I want to tell you what goes on inside your brain that can cause depression. Why? Because I want to show you that those same things going on in my brain that are causing the depression that you may not see as a real disease are actual, real things that I can't just wait until they pass. One of the biological factors that lead to depression is low serotonin levels. Serotonin is a chemical in your body which carries signals along and between your nerves. It's a neurotransmitter which is mainly found in the brain, bowel, and blood platelets. Symptoms of low serotonin levels can include: from: bebrainfit.com Having low serotonin levels doesn't necessarily mean you automatically have depression. In fact, it could actually be worse. Other illnesses and conditions associated with low levels include: fibromyalgia, TMJ (temporomandibular joint disorder), migraines, irritable bowel syndrome, obesity, and asthma. Let's not forget OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder), anxiety, and addiction issues. Lowered levels also increase your risk for heart disease, dementia, and Alzheimer's. Art by Vesuvia The second and third biological factors are also associated with neurotransmitters: Norepinephrine and Dopamine. Norepinephrine is "what most of us think of as the “fight-or-flight” hormones. It functions as a hormone and neurotransmitter and is produced by the adrenal gland, postganglionic neurons of the sympathetic nervous system, and part of the brain called the locus coerules. From the locus coerules, noradrenergic neurons branch out and form a system that enables norepinephrine to be delivered to different parts of the brain. In a similar fashion, the postganglionic neurons enable norepinephrine to be delivered directly to target organs and cells in the body. The adrenal glands dump norepinephrine directly into the blood. These mechanisms usually come into play when we are under stress." (from breakingmuscle.com) - I tried to understand it so I could paraphrase for you, but each subsequent definition I read got more and more technical, so I opted to copy and paste instead of giving you incorrect information. Lowered levels of Norepinephrine are associated with: From: drkaslow.com Most of us have heard of Dopamine, its a neurotransmitter released by the brain and has a hand in movement, memory, behavior and cognition, sleep, mood, and learning. Conditions associated with low levels include: chronic fatigue, RLS (restless leg syndrome), excessive sleep, lessened libido, ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder), and Parkinson’s disease. There's a lot of great info to be found at medlicker.com. So basically, symptoms of neurotransmitter imbalances or neurotransmitter deficiency include: From: holistichelp.net Do you still want to tell me that my depression is just a phase, or that I should get over it, or just wait for it to pass? I have been battling it for as long as I can remember, since my early teens. And make no mistake, it is a battle. It's a battle to get up in the morning, to get washed up and leave the house. To go to work, take care of your children, put on a happy face and deal with the world. All while you're screaming and crying and dying inside. Battling the side effects of the medications, trying to figure out if they're actually worse than the disease. It's a battle not to let it take you. It's a battle to try to remember who you were before you were sad all the time. To not burst into tears for no reason at all, because if you start it won't stop. Battling that tightness in your chest when you have to go anywhere - even just outside your bedroom door. Art by VGgirl607 I don't talk about it. When I do, I get the eye roll from people who know me. They don't understand that those of us coping with this are phenomenal actors. You don't know there's anything wrong with us unless we tell you - or try to kill ourselves. To you we're just lazy, tired, anti-social. According to my family and friends I'm in perfect mental health, because that's what I let them see. And this is why people like Prince Ea and those who share his video with notes like "someone has to say it" are actually doing more harm than good. Maybe you thought you were being helpful, trying to tell someone they can lift themselves out of their fog. Your intentions are good, but dangerous. I wouldn't tell a person with cancer to just hang on until it passes, so don't tell me the same. And let's be very clear - depression does kill. From: cmha.ca Art by emprinsesa
Art by Eredel "The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed." - Stephen King, The Dark Tower Book One: The Gunslinger, 1982 If you haven't read Stephen King's magnum opus, The Dark Tower, you need to put down what you're doing, set aside a week or two, and read it. It's that good. It doesn't even matter whether you're a Stephen King fan or not, this superbly written tale transcends worlds and time, seamlessly blending sci-fi, fantasy, horror, and western genres, and tells a moving tale of love and friendship, terrible loss, and the ultimate quest. The story spans 8 books (and a short story), with the first installment, The Gunslinger, published in 1982. Book Two, The Drawing of the Three was released in 1987. Book Three, The Wastelands in 1991, with the fourth, Wizard and Glass following in 1997. In 2003 we received Book Five, Wolves of the Calla, and in 2004 we were blessed with 2 offerings, Books Six and Seven, Song of Susannah and The Dark Tower, respectively. In 2012 we saw the release of The Wind Through the Keyhole. {The story, it seems, was not done with Mr. King - there were still tales to tell.} TWTTK is the eighth book to be released, but it falls somewhere in between WAG (#4) and WOTC (#5), kind of like a 4.5, as it tells tales of a younger Roland Deschain. I will also mention The Little Sisters of Eluria, which is a short story found in Everything's Eventual. It is kind of a 0.5, although I recommend that TLSOE (#0.5) and TWTTK (4.5) are read after you have completed the 'first' seven books, as they are really just side stories, a little extra gravy on your poutine. There are also the comics, or graphic novels, which tell the tales of Roland's first Ka-Tet. Any actual synopsis of the story will never do it justice, there are just too many subtle nuances intertwined with backstories, love stories, courage, friendship, battle stories, and characters that are so vibrant and rich you believe they actually exist. I will tell you just the basic story, sort of a Cole's Notes of a Cole's Notes. Stripped down to it's bare bones, Stephen King tells a story about a gunslinger on an epic quest through Mid-World. According to the master himself, it's Lord of the Rings meets King Arthur meets Clint Eastwood. I have read this series in full about six or seven times now. All this talk about the movie is making me want to start it again, it's that good. Every time I read it I feel new feelings about different situations, like reading the books with a fresh pair of eyes. Ever since we got a little tease in The Mist, a 2007 movie where the protagonist, David, who paints movie posters for a living is seen painting a Dark Tower poster, myself and countless other DT fans have been holding our breath waiting for the announcement that Roland and his Ka-Tet will make it to the big screen. When the announcement finally arrived, I was shattered. Ron Howard had signed on to direct. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed Lady in the Lake, The Missing, and Apollo 13, among others not adapted for the big screen from novels. However, Mr. Howard takes too many liberties and butchers other people's work. DaVinci Code, anyone? How the authors allow it, I will never understand. I get that they think, "ooh, what would happen if Mr. X went with the blue shirt rather than the yellow", but we bibliophiles love the book for what it is. Streamlining for time constraints is one thing, but completely changing the story flow, characters, and/or ending just because is quite another. From IMDb.com Since then, I have heard that he will co-direct and then that he had to remove himself from the project (YAY!) because he couldn't dedicate enough time to the project to do it justice. Now it seems that he is still tied to the project, just as a producer. I don't care why he's gone, I'm just happy he is. The new director is a guy named Nikolaj Arcel. Never heard of him? Yeah, me either. He has directed five whole movies since 2001, and one of those is a short. I haven't seen nor heard of even one of the movies he is credited with directing. And this is the guy who will be taking on the epic genius of Stephen King's Dark Tower, a series which is supposed to be turned into three movies with the possibility of a "when Roland was young" set on Netflix? I'm not sure how I feel about that. From IMDb.com And now I will tackle the controversy that is causing some stir in the DT community. Casting. I will discuss Idris Elba, who is causing most of the stir, but I have other concerns first. Take a look at the above list of actors who have been cast. I am extremely concerned that I don't see Susannah and Dean on this list yet. Are we doing Movie One only with Jake? Yes, Susannah and Dean don't enter the story until the second book, but the first book is actually the shortest of all (it started it's life as a short story sold to a magazine initially), and most of the roles I see on the list above don't show up in it. While we're on the topic of roles that don't show up until later in the series, let's tackle the character of "Tirana". I actually had to google this, because I have read the series in it's entirety numerous times, and I'll be honest with you, I draw a blank with this one. Apparently I'm not alone. "Tirana is definitely not the female lead in the novels. In fact, she’s so obscure that even hardcore fans don’t seem quite sure who she is — I’ve seen some readers swear up and down that no one named Tirana exists in the books." -slashfilm.com So she's the 'lead' female character in the movie, and no one remembers her. Apparently she shows up in Book Seven. As far as I remember, Susannah Dean/Detta Walker gets the title of Lead. I'm also relatively sure that anyone who has read DT would agree. Oh, and by the way, if Tirana is supposed to be kind of Susannah, but different, congrats Hollywood, you just cast yet another white woman in a clearly black role. Just sayin'. Art by RavenMedia As for the other roles already cast, Pimli & Sayre are from much later in the books, Susan is from a lifetime away (Roland's first love), I'm confused about Arra, another minor character I had to google to remember (and seems to me almost a character within a story within a story), who really doesn't seem that important. Rounding out the questions is which character will Katheryn Winnick play? Judging from the fact that we have Jake, his best friend, and his shrink cast, many are speculating she will play his mother, who is absentee at best in the Jake story, and totally unnecessary in a film adaptation. The first movie seems way too much Jake and the battle of Algul Siento, with a little Mejis and some Low Men thrown in for good measure. I'm not sure that picking these particular elements to introduce the story are a good choice. I guess the time has come to speak about the whole controversy surrounding Idris Elba as the gunslinger himself, Roland Deschain. Please do not take my next comments as racist. I like to think that I am not. Roland is not a black man. Do you know how I and anyone in the DT fanverse know this? Above all else, it is because Detta (split personality within Odetta/Detta/Susannah character) likes to call him a "honky mahfah" more often than not. She is, as I mentioned before, a very important character in the DT series. When we first meet her, she is a horribly racist, emotionally scarred, scary as hell, black woman. She is an amazing character and one of the strongest female black characters I have ever encountered, whether on screen or on the page. Since it looks like they're removing her past (modern-day New York, she's from 1964 New York), are they also removing a crucial part of her storyline? What she went through because of who she is matters, and it made her the powerhouse she is as Susannah. Maybe they'll just make her white? Hey, we can still have the racism thing then, right? As I mentioned previously, there is talk that white actress Abbey Lee is playing the 'lead female' character, although hers has a different name. But I digress. Mr. Elba is an incredibly talented actor. Avengers, Thor, Pacific Rim, and Prometheus, just a few of the movies that jump to mind where he is memorable. And I'll be completely honest with you, I've seen shots from the set and some concept art, and he looks bad-ass as the gunslinger. If you haven't read the books and aren't fanatic about them, he is a fantastic choice. The colour of an actor on page vs on screen actually doesn't really bother me (Morgan Freeman playing a middle-aged Irishman in The Shawshank Redemption quickly comes to mind), if race plays no part in the story. If you cut out the whole Odetta part, I really wouldn't take issue with this casting choice, I would totally embrace it. Thing is (I know I keep going back to this, but it matters), Roland, Dean, and Odetta/Detta must cross this bridge to get to where they're going. There's no real way around it. Unless you are telling a different story. And maybe that is exactly what is happening here. I know, this is such a long post! Can you tell it means so much to me? Honestly, even after writing all of this, I still can't even touch upon how much of an impact these books have had on me. I promise it's almost over, and for those of you who made it this far... thanks for sticking with me. Two things remain to discuss. First I want to talk about Mathew McConaughey as The Man in Black. I will take a thousand black Rolands over this choice. He is not exactly stellar acting material. Yes, yes, we were all (shockingly) really impressed by him in True Detective. But one good role does not automatically make you ready or able to play all roles they way they need to be played. Randall Flagg is no surfer dude and his idea of a good time is not the same as ours. Click his name and check out Matthew's filmography. Prolific, but not exactly the stuff Oscars are made of. On top of my already negative feel towards Mr. McConaughey, I read somewhere that he was going to take a crazy, anything goes type of approach to the role. I immediately pictured him trying to channel Ledger's Joker from beneath the hood. I think I even cried a little as a small part of me died inside. I just feel like each casting announcement they make is one mistake after another, just compounding the issues. I will leave you with my personal picks on who should play the main characters. I'm not getting into Sayre or Tirana or Timmy, because they just don't matter at this point in the game. Most of my picks have been my picks for a really long time, some had to change because those I envisioned had the audacity to get old while I held my breath for this movie. Roland Deschain A.K.A. The Gunslinger
Honorable mention goes to Hugh Jackman. Randall Flagg A.K.A. The Man in Black It is not easy to find a great 'picture' of him, and for good reason, he is every nightmare you're ever had all rolled into one, especially the ones that started out as wonderful dreams.
Jake Chambers
I'm okay with the casting of Tom Taylor as Jake (shocking, I know), he's obviously very close to who I originally envisioned playing this role. I would like to point out that Jaden was really enjoyable to watch in After Earth, so he's my actual pick for this role. Eddie Dean Who? Those not in the DT fandom probably haven't heard this name yet. Either he hasn't been cast, or he's not in this movie. Doesn't matter, he is a pivotal part of Roland's Ka-Tet.
Honorable mention goes to the one and only Keanu Reeves. Susannah Dean A.K.A Odetta/Detta Walker Another character so pivotal to the story who has neither been cast nor mentioned by the people involved in the DT movie. She is absolutely the one and only female lead in this series!
Danai's Michonne character on The Walking Dead has evolved in a way very similar to Susannah's journey - harsh & alone to caring & mother-figure The Director A.K.A. the Guy in Charge Okay, so he's not a character - but he (or she) is so important because he has to be making the correct decisions right from the start. Who's that guy with all the awards? Why, Peter Jackson, my friends! He has always been and always will be my absolute number one and only choice for directing a movie of this scope and magnitude. Period. Whew! That was a long one. I think this is my magnum opus of blog posts - it took me about three days to get this all together.
How about you? Any thoughts on casting? Are you going to see the movie(s), or even better, if you haven't read the books, has my zeal inspired you to do so? Apparently when you get into it with an aggressive driver in Oshawa and try to report it to the DRPS (Durham Regional Police Services), they don't really care. Here's what happened to me today: I drove to Walmart to pick up my son at around 11:30am and proceeded to make a left turn (with my indicator flashing) at an intersection. I do not have a stop sign at this location, southbound traffic does have a stop sign. I saw the vehicle approaching his stop sign, make a quick stop, then proceed to turn right, as I am turning left. I did not stop as I had the right of way. He honked his horn. I gave him the finger. I am not proud of it, but I didn't like that he was attempting to force his way without right of way AND honked at me after. I was going to pull to the side to pick my son up, but decided to keep driving as he was driving very closely behind me and I was concerned. It was the menacing way too close and off to the left side kind of following that is so cliche in road rage. I continued to drive along the parking lot, with him close behind. I came to the end of the driveway and made a right turn onto Harmony, he followed close behind. I made another right turn at the first intersection, Coldstream, and he followed. I was very concerned at this point that this man in an SUV was going to keep following me and I had to get my son but didn't know whether I could safely pull over to do that. Or should I just drive home, and was he going to follow me there also? I was starting to freak out. I hit my brakes hoping that he would just pass and I could ask why he was following me (not in a very conversational tone, I admit). Because he was so close and hell bent on staying right behind me, he hit my vehicle from behind. At this point he decided to pull out and drive off. I gave chase, trying to get my cellphone out to take picture of his license plate for evidence. I can only assume that after a few minutes of driving and me following taking pictures (he had pulled back into the Walmart parking lot at this time), he pulled over. I parked next to him and when our windows were down I started to yell at him, asking why he would hit my car and take off. He got out. I got out. He started telling me to calm down and saying that I had gone through the intersection very aggressively. I told him I had the right of way, so I can pretty much drive through it any way I please. He needed to wait until his way was perfectly clear. I also told him he had no right to follow me, and that rear ending me is his fault, no matter what. He said it was all me because I stopped suddenly. I demanded his license, ownership, and insurance. He looked at the back of my car and said there was very little damage, he would pay for it, gave me his business card, got into his vehicle, and drove off. After I dropped my son off at home (and tried to calm down a little before getting back behind the wheel), I went to the closest police station at 77 Center St. N. to report a hit and run. The officer listened to my story (a quick rundown of the above), took the guy's business card from me, called him and spoke very pleasantly on the phone, getting his insurance information. He then told him he'd call him back with my information, to be ready with a pen and paper. Then he got my info and pretty much sent me on my way. I asked if that was it. The officer said "because the damage is under $1000, it is a non reportable accident" and the other guy was saying I was the aggressor while I claimed it was him, so there was nothing more to be done. I said this wasn't about the damage to my vehicle, this was about how this guy acted, and taking off after hitting me. According to him, since this guy gave me his business card, he didn't really take off. Apparently he didn't know that in the even of an accident the drivers are supposed to exchange information. And since this is a "he said-she said" there was nothing more that he would do. I repeated HE followed ME, HE hit ME. I was aggressive later, I don't deny that, but I didn't start the aggression. The officer said that there was no way to prove who was telling the truth. The officer was so nonchalant about the whole thing. He was so focused on the fact that there was less than $1000 damage to my vehicle, that he totally missed the reason I was there. This guy scared the crap out of me, rear-ended me, and took off. Because I chased him down and he gave me his business card, the officer felt it was okay because he identified himself. Wow. Just wow. If I didn't follow him, taking pictures the whole way, this guy wouldn't have stopped at all. He gave the cop a sob story that I was being the aggressor, and apparently he was more credible. Not the woman who walked into the station to report the incident, who, by the way, has damage to the rear of her vehicle. I will admit that I got out of my car on fire. My adrenaline was already pumping because honestly this guy scared me by the way he was following, close behind and off to the left. I drive a small car and he's driving an SUV. I'm alone in my car, trying to figure out how to get rid of him so I can go back to the Walmart to pick my son up, who is calling me asking why I just drove past him. When he hit me and just took off, all fear melted away and was replaced with pure rage. How dare he? Many years ago I was rear ended at a red light and had to chase the guy down to get his license plate number because he took off. So I was really pissed that he would take off like that. So tell me, am I wrong in thinking that this guy deserves more than a pleasant phone call from a police officer asking for his insurance information? I am not willing to let this lie. What he did was wrong and potentially dangerous. Let's pretend for a moment that the collision hadn't occurred. Exactly how long and how far was this man willing to follow me? And what were his intentions towards me when I finally did stop somewhere? I was genuinely frightened and I wonder what, if anything, would have been different if the collision had not occurred and I just walked into the police station with the guy's plate number and the road rage story?
Judging from news reports, I am one of the few people in Southern Ontario who was actually pretty excited that Toronto is hosting the Pan Am /ParaPan Am Games this time around. I know, It's not the Olympics, but I still think it's kinda cool that something this big is going on here. We had intended to see an event, just so we can say we were there and saw something happen. The nice thing about not all the events taking place in the city of Toronto is that those of us who just cannot stand the congestion can see an event in relative peace. So on Canada Day I received an email that they were having a 25% off sale, and I jumped at the chance and bought 4 tickets to see Canada VS Nicaragua in a preliminary baseball game at the President's Choice Pan Am Ballpark. For 2 kids (under 16) and 2 adults, I paid $80 after discounts, taxes, and fees. Not bad. But I know why tickets are so affordable. Well, two reasons, I guess. The first being that they want people to come, so if they price the tickets reasonably, there's a better chance that families like mine will go. The second has to be the sick pricing structure for pretty much everything else at the venue.
I do also have one more thing to gripe about - the organization at the venue. Going into the game, I was not impressed. Happy during. Leaving the game I was not impressed. Living in Durham, we know the route to take to get to the location of the venue, Audley & Taunton. However, I suppose they did not expect too many people to be arriving from the Durham Region, because there was only one sign, approximately ten feet from the street we would have had to turn onto, telling us that Audley was closed at Rossland. As we drove past it, I saw it very quickly, but was not able to read the whole sign. Quite frankly, even if I had seen it sooner, we would not have had time to turn on Lakeridge anyhow. So we had to drive further West, then North, then back East, following the signs to get to the ballpark. I was none too impressed with that. There should have been ample warning so we could make a decision as to where to turn North sooner. We get there, park in the grass, with very little direction at this point from signs or volunteers. You kinda just have to wing it and hope for the best. Did I mention the car was a 15 minute walk from the actual stadium? Well, it was. Ugh. Although it was lovely to walk in nature before we got to the event, I could have done without it, and I could have done without the weird walking path they had. There were these hard rubber sheets to walk on with deep grooves on them. Unless you're wearing thick-soled shoes (which I wasn't), they hurt your feet. Then came the gravel path, always fun to get stones in your shoes when you have a long way to walk. It's summer... people are wearing sandals and flip-flops. These two choices for something to walk on would probably be lower on my list, maybe just above 'hot coals' and 'broken glass sprinkled with salt'. We get to the actual stadium (bottom of the second), and I was really, really underwhelmed as to the sight that greeted me. I was expecting some food, drink, and merchandise vendors. Instead, there was the ballpark to my right, I think a huge field of porta potties on the left, and a few random people selling bottled tap water or beer out of coolers. Since it was general seating, it was tough to find anything. There wasn't really anyone helping out, either. I wasn't really impressed at his point by my experience. Getting out was worse... no direction whatsoever, the only exit signs to be seen at the end of the lot, and if you're there, you already know where the exit is. We finally did find some seats, and they turned out to be really great. We had a fantastic view of all the action, and since we were sitting in a predominantly Nicaraguan area, the players from Nicaragua were coming over and tossing balls into our area for the fans that stayed past the seventh inning. All the doom and gloom aside, I enjoyed the game. I am definitely more interested in winter sports, however, I have to say that it's always fun when your team is winning, and after a slow start, that's exactly what Team Canada did. The crowd was great, the seating sucked, but the experience was still enjoyable. As I mentioned before - organization was poor, which is pretty sad. Don't let my doom and gloom stop you from going to see a game or two yourself. It's a once in a lifetime thing happening right now, and you should endeavor to take part in it in some small way. It is a great thing, and we should take pride in it. One last thing. There has been a whole lot of talk about how little everyone cares about these games. I do want to point out that although I think it's great that they're here and I'll support them, they were really doomed from the start. Here in Ontario we are way more interested in winter sports than summer ones. We're also not the rowdiest of fans on a good day. Then, you have to remember that these are North & South American games. No European countries. You want tourists and pandemonium? Host a sporting even with European countries as participants. They'll come in droves. Just sayin'.
Around 100,000 people have laser eye surgery each year. Since this number is growing, and I haven't personally heard any horror stories, I have to guess that it's highly successful for most. I also have to guess that I am one of the unlucky few for whom it just doesn't stick. Let me start at the beginning. I have worn corrective lenses (eyeglasses and contact lenses) since I was in the 7th grade. Back in 2010 I decided to go in and get the free screening done at Lasik MD in North York. I went through all the various eye exams and was told that due to my age and level of eye health, I was the 'perfect candidate' for laser eye surgery. I'm relatively sure that somewhere between 95-99% of the people who come in for the free screening are told the same thing. During the last exam, which is the one we're all familiar with and consists of reading letters off of a chart, I informed the tech that my prescription changes with each visit to the optometrist. He told me that was "impossible" - his exact words. He went on to elaborate that factors such as eye strain, tiredness, headaches and any number of normal day-to-day things could be the cause of my apparent prescription fluctuations. I still wasn't convinced, mostly because I was petrified something would go wrong and I'd go blind after surgery, but my husband thought it was something I should do, so I guess that was settled. So we went in, signed the papers and paid $4000 for Zyoptics, Lasik's upgraded surgery (at the time) with lifetime enhancement. The whole 'lifetime enhancement' should have raised a red flag, but I guess hindsight is 20/20. My first surgery went well. Dr. Bashour assuaged my fears about blindness and the procedure was over quickly. I walked into the office with 20/100 vision and walked out with 20/10. It was a fantastic feeling to see so well. I couldn't even remember the last time I was able to see so clearly without my glasses or contacts. In hindsight, I wish that I knew then that even the possibility that this vision would fade in just a few short years because that would definitely have had an impact on my decision of whether to undergo the surgery or not. After my eyes healed and the time dedicated to medicated drops and weekly eye exams was over, I started to notice issues with my eyes that I did not have before. The worst I think is my sensitivity to light. I've always been a little sensitive, I've read it has something to do with light eyes, they let in more light than dark, but the last four years have been particularly terrible. I cannot go outside without sunglasses. If I do forget them I can barely open my eyes when its sunny. For the first year after my 2010 surgery I actually had to wear sunglasses when I drove at night. Yes, you read that correctly. At night, the brightness of headlights of oncoming traffic could blind me. I am not exaggerating. I was actually temporarily blinded. Since I left my house at 4:45am to drive an hour to work in the dark, you can imagine I spent a whole lot of that trip using the force. I was also temporarily blinded by the glare of streetlights on wet pavement. Although it has subsided (I no longer have to wear the sunglasses) it is still blinding and seems to be something I'm going to have to get used to for the remainder of my life. My eyes are dry, itchy, irritated and feel like they have sand or an eyelash in them about 75% of the time. It feels like that right now. Eyedrops help for about 5 seconds after I put them in. Then its back to rubbing, squinting, closing and excessive blinking. Until you have to deal with this every day of your life, you don't realize how painful and downright irritating it can be to have the feeling that something sharp is scratching your eyes almost all of the time. I have floaties and eye boogies on a regular basis. I know those are highly technical medical terms, but that's just how I roll. I'm sure this has something to do with the near-constant irritation. It's really embarrassing sometimes when you're having a conversation with someone and you can see the floatie cross your vision. Do they see it too? You just have to deal with it because you can't start rubbing your eye in the middle of a conversation - and it doesn't help anyway. You can't seem to get rid of them until they randomly decide to go away on their own. As for the eye boogies, it's always awesome when you look at yourself in the mirror after an important meeting or job interview and there they are - making it look like you couldn't be bothered to wash your face that morning. So maybe you're reading this and still thinking, okay, small price to pay for 20/10 vision. Well, here's the kicker: it didn't last. Not for me, at least. Within a year my vision was already worsening and at the two year mark I was already way overdue for corrective lenses. Thanks to the constant dryness, contact lenses are no longer an option. If I can even get them into my eyes (sometimes it felt like I was putting shards of glass in, even if it was a fresh lense straight out of the package), I could only wear them for about an hour or two. No matter how much solution I squirted into my eyes, the dryness and pain was too much and I had to remove them. I couldn't even think about wearing them two days in a row. The pain was intense, no matter how well I cleaned & sanitized them or how long I soaked them. So in 2012 I went in for a second enhancement. Since the flap that they cut never heals, all they do is peel it back, laser off a little more from the surface of your eye, slide the flap back and Bob's your uncle. After a few follow up exams I was told that I had 0.03mm of scar tissue (cell growth), but that was minimal and nothing to worry about. I had 20/10 vision again. Fast forward to 2014 and my vision is blurry again. I go in for my eye exam (which cost me $200 now that it has been five years since my original surgery has passed - not sure how that math works) and they inform me that since I'm 40 now getting another enhancement could trigger near-sightedness. That highly technical term pretty much means that I could be trading regular glasses for reading glasses, which I do not currently require. Their solution was to enhance only my right, dominant eye, and force my left to work harder to compensate. They gave me contacts (which were useless thanks to the discomfort and pain) and set my surgery for a month hence. The day of my third surgery I decided not to get the sedative, which was a bad mistake. Although I had already done this twice before and knew what to expect, when its actually happening and you're fully aware, well let me tell you that your blood pressure skyrockets. So my advice - take the sedative. After waiting for about two hours, I was brought into the surgery. Up until this point I had been told by every single person I came in contact with at Lasik MD that scar tissue was nothing to be concerned about. I sit down for Dr. Bashour to have a last look at my eye before he lasers it and he proceeds to scare the living shit out of me. My husband's theory is that he did this so that I'd think twice before I came back for more 'free' surgery. Anyhow, he looks at me and starts to tell me how dangerous any cell regrowth is and that with each subsequent enhancement the chances of me getting more goes up and it becomes more serious. He tells me that some people have to come back and have it scraped off multiple times or have their flap sewn shut to prevent future growth. Thanks. After looking at my eyes, he tells me that mine is minimal and I have good genes. As soon as I lay on the table I regretted not taking the sedative. I think that my anxiety was worse because I knew what was going to happen and was fully aware of him pulling back the flap, feeling the heat of the laser and the smell of burning flesh. I don't really know what burning flesh smells like, but there was a very distinct, unpleasant odor that I can only assume that was what burning eyeball smells like. I am thankful that it was over in mere minutes. I remained there, getting my eyedrops put in and getting checked on for the next 45 minutes. I was a little surprised when they called me about an hour after I left to see how I was doing, considering they hadn't done that before. The receptionist who called told me that with each subsequent enhancement the pain is worse, so that's why the doctor wanted her to call to check in with me. She wasn't lying about the pain, either. By the time she called, I was sitting outside the Shopper's Drug Mart as they made me wait a half hour for four bottles of eyedrops, and my right eye was on fire. That pain lasted for a few days, but I didn't get the migraines that lasted for a week, which I did get with my first two surgeries. I only had one really bad one - when I tried to go to work two days after enhancement. After a few days there was no more pain and no more migraines. The day after my surgery, I went to my post-op checkup and was told yet again what a minor issue scar tissue was and that it was nothing to be concerned about. Interesting. The next three post-ops I asked about the scar tissue. I had some new cell growth (she did not tell me how much) and each time reminded me how it was definitely nothing to worry about. In the time since, my vision has improved (20/20 when using both to look at the chart) and my eyes don't burn, but since they only did the one eye, I do have some issues with focus. I think it's my left eye wanting to do what it always does and my right taunting it to give up and get with the program. Hindsight is 20/20 (pun intended) and had I known then that all of this was a possibility, I would not have undergone the enhancement. Yes, I can see without glasses or contacts, although I do have a brand spankin' new prescription for glasses so that I can see well enough to drive at night. With everything that I have gone through, with everything I will have to deal with for the rest of my life and knowing that I'll most likely be wearing glasses again in four years, it just doesn't seem like a fair trade-off. Why did I write this post?
It wasn't to deter people from having their own vision enhanced by way of laser surgery. I wanted to get my own story out, so that you can know what I didn't when I was making my decision. When someone has more facts, it's never a bad thing. I also wanted to let you know that sometimes, not everyone is the 'perfect candidate'. If I wrote a list of my top ten pet peeves, asshole drivers in one form or another would probably make up 70% of that list. Today I'm going to rant about people who feel the need to clamp onto my rear bumper and ride it the whole way. I absolutely hate, hate, hate people who tailgate. There is no reason for it. Let's put aside the fact that it's really dumb and dangerous, it's just plain annoying. Often, you'll get the exact opposite effect of what you're trying to accomplish. You're up someone's ass because you want them to go faster (I guess), but more often than not, you'll just make the driver in front of you nervous or pissed and they'll slow down. I know I do, just to piss you off. Although sometimes I think that maybe it's just the sheep mentality or they maybe haven't mastered the art of setting their own speed rather than following the car in front. However, both of those can be remedied by leaving a little space between you and the car in front. I have to admit that I am guilty of this on rare occasions. Since I started working closer to home and don't deal with 2+ hours of traffic each day, I have become a much calmer driver, and generally I let things go. However, there are some circumstances where I find myself riding someone's ass. One excellent example is driving in the left-most lane of a five lane highway, such as the 401, and being stuck behind someone driving 100 km/h. I understand that's the limit, but you have to understand that you're in the fast lane, also known as the passing lane, and there is absolutely no reason for you to be there. So, having fully disclosed my own guilt in this area, I will list the times when you should back off and relax a little. 1) Single lane roads. Yes, it does suck when you're stuck behind someone who wants to drive limit or just below on these roads and you don't have another lane to get into, but they are well within their rights and you just have to deal with it or pass using the oncoming lane. Being a douche will not make them drive any faster. Along the same lines, if you're the second car behind the slow driver, do you really think that sitting on the bumper of the car in front of yours will give him the ability to go any faster? Maybe they'll finally learn how to leap frog so that you can put the petal to the metal? I guess it's possible, but not very probable. 2) The right lane. I'm including regular city roads and highways here. There is absolutely never any reason for tailgating in this situation. You have another lane to pass the slowpoke, and if your turn or exit is coming up, tough shit. Relax a little, you'll get there. I have had this happen to me more often that I'd like to recount. I generally drive about 15 km/hr over the limit and I'm almost always in the right lane. Although it doesn't seem that many people are taught that anymore, I was, and for me the left lane, whether on the 401 or Steeles, is for passing or getting ready to make a left turn. I absolutely hate looking in the rearview and seeing not the front end of a vehicle, but your front seat when I'm driving a decent speed in the right lane. 3) Emergency vehicles, large trucks and motorcycles. Emergency vehicles such as ambulances and fire trucks need their space, as you never know when the emergency call will come and they may need to back up and turn around to get there. Stop being selfish and think for a moment that it could be your child's life in danger and seconds may make a difference. As for large trucks, that's more about your safety than theirs. Take a look at that truck - he's a lot bigger and stronger than you are. If he kicks back or if a tire or anything else flies off of the back end of it, you have a lot more time to maneuver out of harm's way if there's some space behind his back and your front end. Motorcycles. I just cannot understand this one. I cringe whenever I see this. You do understand that there is a possibility that they'll hit a rock or pothole and fall? How are you going to feel for the rest of your life knowing you ran over and killed a man just because you insisted on driving too closely and could not swerve when he got into a bit of trouble. I hope that if you are one of those people who feel it's necessary to smell my farts as you drive, you'll think twice. You are not the only person on the road, and although we'd all like to be able to drive as fast as we want, that's just not the case. More and more vehicles are on the road every year, and unfortunately, more and more drivers either are not trained properly, or can't be bothered to even try to drive properly and courteously. We also have quite the aging population who feel that driving themselves is integral to maintaining their independence. As long as they can see, hear and their mental faculties are in order, there's nothing wrong with that, we'll just have to take it easy and slow down the pace. I am neither elderly nor on a motorcycle nor am I a particularly slow driver, but I can tell you that I have way too many people driving way too closely on a regular basis, and I don't appreciate it. **UPDATE 08/06/14** After an afternoon of treacherous driving during a downpour, I would also like to add this, which I am shocked that I forgot while entering the original post: 4) Inclement Weather. Vision and stopping times are both impaired when road conditions are less than ideal. Let's face it, we live in Canada, and we get more than our fair share of crappy weather. It doesn't matter how fantastic your snow tires are, you still need to leave some space between your bumpers! Snow and ice are incredibly slippery and difficult to stop on. Rain causes ponding which can lead to hydroplaning. These are situations where a little extra space can and often does make the difference. You will not get there any faster by riding the person in front of you's bumper. In fact, it may be quite the opposite - you could potentially rear end them, and then it will take you much longer to get to where you were going. I hate door-to-door salespeople. Yup, I really, really hate you. Whether you're looking to sell me a green lawn, discount tickets to the nearest pub, or chocolates for your school trip - I'm not interested. Going through your spiel right after I tell you I'm not interested will not make me change my mind. I didn't want your crap before, I certainly don't want it now that you've kept me at my door for longer than I needed to be past "not interested". When I get home from work I change out of my work clothes and throw on my rattiest jammies or tights and t-shirt. I want to be comfortable after I've been standing on my feet all day. I also have crap to do when I get home, like make dinner, do the laundry, dishes, homework with the kids, etc. When I hear the doorbell ring my blood pressure goes through the roof. Why? Because you have a knack to show up at my door just as I've started a sauce that needs to stirred constantly or it will burn. Or in the middle of a really, really interesting part of a show (no, I DON'T WANT to pause it). Or right as I'm cleaning lizard shit off my floor. Or I've just sat down at the dinner table. You get the point. It is a rare thing that I'm just sitting around doing absolutely nothing, waiting for something to happen. The same goes for weekends and the few days I get off during the week (yes, they show up on week days also, I just had one), except it makes me even angrier. Leave me alone. Either I have things to or I'm getting prepared for guests. Either way, am I making my point? I don't have the time or patience to listen to you. I have tried to find a "NO SOLICITING" sign, but I have been unsuccessful. I have a feeling they wouldn't read it anyway. I have tried in the past to be polite and listen to you go on and on about how your product is so fantastic I have to buy 3 right now and sign up for a monthly subscription for the rest of my natural life (and possibly will it to my grandkids). However, I have found that if I need something, I will either a) already have it; b) go out and buy it; or c) look it up online. Perhaps I do need it, but maybe I just cannot afford it right now. None of those scenarios require a person to come to my door to tell me I need it first. Often I find that once the person goes through their memorized speech, you politely decline, and they start in on the second prepared speech. The one where you are no longer the soft sell, you're now the hard one. Maybe they'll try to guilt you in to it. That's happened to me on a few occasions. The last time, I felt bad for the animals and said: 'fine, I'll give you $20". She said great, got out her little form for me to fill out, and did not mention until I was done with the form that it was $20 a month. They were not interested in one-time donations. Oh, no, they wanted my money every month. Suffice it to say, she did not get the $20. Nowadays I open the door and while the smile is still forming at the corners of their mouths I tell them I'm not interested and I close the door. The smile turns upside down real quick. I have been called "awesome rude" (yes, I can hear you through the door), but quite frankly, you're on my doorstep, wasting my time. I think I have every right to not want to talk to you for even a second. The only reason I open the door is because I have a huge window in the door, and you can see me. I have even peeked around the corner some days, seen who it was and sat silently in the kitchen or family room (wherever I happened to be at the time) and waited until I hear them walking back down the front steps. Sometimes after ringing and knocking two and three times. I had a very interesting pair come to my door last summer. I was in the kitchen getting coffee when they rang the doorbell. I looked over and made a shooing motion with my hand. It was Sunday morning, and I just wanted to enjoy my coffee and the nice day it was shaping up to be. I sit my butt down on the couch and the doorbell rings again. I get up, look at the door and it's still them. Really? I shoo again and yell out, "not interested". I was also in my pjs at the time, no bra, face and teeth unwashed. Not exactly presentable. I go back, sit down and the bastards start hammering on my door! I could not believe it. I got up, stormed to the door, opened it and started screaming at them like a crazy woman. Profanities may have been used. I just want to put this out there: if you're selling crap door to door and the person gives you two different signs that they don't want to answer the door, you probably should move on to the next house. Or just go home. We don't want you ringing our doorbells anyway. I also have to single out these two groups: To the kids/adults selling chocolate and/or candy: Maybe I'm not saying no because I'm an asshole and I hate you (I probably am and do). Maybe I'm diabetic. Maybe I have a weight problem and the last thing I need is a Mars bar on my counter. Maybe I don't feed crap like that to my kids if I can help it. Maybe I really don't have even $2 to spend right now. There are a hundred possible reasons I'm saying no. Don't give me that face (you know which one) or that attitude (you definitely know which one), because I do not owe you an explanation. And just so you know, I have NEVER sent my kids to your door begging for money. To the people looking for a donation to (insert name here) charitable organization: Again, maybe I'm not saying no because I'm an asshole and I hate you (I probably am and do). Maybe I am trying to figure out on my minimum wage salary how I'm going to feed my kids this week. $20 doesn't sound like a lot. But to me it is. The cost of a cup of coffee a day, you say? I can't afford a cup of coffee a day. I make mine and bring it with me to work. I live in a house, so you automatically think I have a disposable income you can have. Maybe all of hubby's paycheck is going to the mortgage and maybe all of mine is going to food. There's not much left over for you or the orphans or your soccer team or the polar bears floating on the melting glacier ice, sorry. But this is not really any of your business, so piss off and don't give me attitude when I turn you away. Or better yet, just don't ring my doorbell. |
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